Vote for me. I am your best friend.

This is an article I wrote about the upcoming AUB elections. Tell me what you think.

So imagine this: there's this someone who adds you on facebook with a million AUB friends in common, you accept, but still have no idea who the hell she is. Next thing you know she sends u a message saying:
"Heyyy [insert name here]. how are you? wen hal ghaybe? (long time no see). You know i'm running for SRC right? i'm counting on your vote, ok? don't forget me (since I'm you're friend n all)! and btw good luck with your exams :D"
which brings us back to "Vote for me, I'm your closest bestest friend!". and you have this look on your face: "say whaaa? do I know you?" and she's like: "you know I was with you in that class and I sat behind you (but you are beneath me and I wouldn't be caught dead talking to you in regular circumstances, but now since I need your vote we should get to know each other, since you know, I am your close friend)."

And just in case you care (which I seriously doubt), you ask about their platform and they bring some hyper representative to regurgitate the platform from the last three years while the candidate you are supposed to vote for says: "what she said".

And you ask: "can you really build an escalator from upper to lower campus?" and they go "definitely, do I think I joke with issues like these?" while they pose and turn around for you to admire their godly beauty, as if on a cat walk or a red carpet with cameras flashing.

Then comes along this twit who whispers: "you're [8/14] right? you have to vote for this full list. don't remove anyone! don't add anyone! what's your name and number? you know in case you didn't show up on election day so we can drag you to vote. I know you don't know anyone from the list, and I know they are shitty candidates who have no clue what SRC stands for, and I know that they have brains of rabbits, but you have to vote for them anyway, because you don't want the "others" to win, do you?"

Like seriously, you would think people running for elections would be smart. Seriously, do you expect me to vote for you after this "warm-hearted" speech? It's not that they are stupidifying the whole SRC elections and Lebanese politics (which are stupid to begin with), they are also trying to stupidify the voters.

And then comes the groupies who blindly follow "the greater cause" and scream meaningless and utterly dull slogans and pose for pictures, because you know, that's what the elections are for. Skipping classes, having fun, and enriching my CV! I don't even go to any meetings, meetings which get canceled after quorum is not achieved time after time after time. "Why even go to meetings? we know that we cannot accomplish anything. We were just in this for our "leader" to brag that the youth majority belongs to him. We know that the morning after, these leaders will disappear again into their magical money-filled lanterns to hibernate for the next nine months until the next elections comes by. We don't care, as long as we win."

That is why I do not believe any candidate is worth my vote, and your vote as well. Political candidates are sheep to fake ideologies (yes Rita, I know its ironic) while independents are only there to prove that independents can win, or to show how popular they are, or to promote certain clubs (that shall remain nameless for the purpose of objectivity - as if you don't know who I'm talking about). None of them can really accomplish anything for AUB or its students.

In case you are still blinded and haven't yet noticed, the tuition has increased more than a thousand dollars this year (in FAS) and the SRC/USFC did absolutely nothing about it. What makes you believe that any of these prancing hooligans can really make a difference this year? Is it their energetic promises, their cheerful hairdos or their platforms that came from the history book? It was attributed to one of the x-AUB presidents (who shall also remain nameless) that "AUB SRC and USFC have very limited power, and no matter what they decide, the board will make the decisions based upon the best interest of the university." (no I don't have the direct citation, and I don't really plan on searching for it).

The whole AUB elections are really nothing but a tragic comedy. They are there just to put AUB in the spotlight, to get news coverage: to be on newspapers, radio stations and television. They are there to promote fake democracy, so that donors are impressed and don't feel sorry about their huge donations. These donations that are wasted on lighting and cooling the new business school 24/24 months before it was even open (don't even get me started on financial aid, work study and the efficiency of [some] staff). It is necessary to blow millions of dollars on events that no one really cares about rather than improving the crappy departments, giving raises to staff to improve efficiency, and improving teacher's quality. Have you seen the AUB medical school? Have you seen how pitiful and shitty its classes, labs and hallways are? It's right out of 70s prison movie, and the bathrooms in these movies are much better. To think that students pay $104,000 to graduate with an MD. It's a shame how they spend 4 years of their lives like lab rats.

Because its better to feed the cat population on campus rather than providing parking for students who pay parking fees more than their car's worth (as if the tuition is not enough). Because the cats will decrease the pollution caused by these parking lots. Because one of the x-president's wives loved cats, now a part of the tuition goes to feeding them.

Does the candidates running for elections really care? Does the SRC really care? take a guess! ...
Think about this when you go cast your vote. Let your leaders brag that they won with another $1,000 tuition increase next year. See if they care.

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That is why I am promoting voting blank. Lots of you will say its just a waste of a vote, or that we won't be able to accomplish anything, that we will not be heard. If only 50 or 100 votes were blank, our voice will be heard. It will occur to the administration that something is wrong. We can tell the administration that the current situation is not satisfactory. They will know that the students are sick of this bogus democracy. You can get your voices heard. Off course one political party will end up winning this year, we cannot change the system overnight. Baby steps, that's what we need.

* Disclaimer: This article does not attack any single person or political group nor does it attack any specific staff, faculty, department or student member at AUB. It is simply stating the obvious. The views included are solely my own and may not reflect the views of the people tagged in or commented on this note.